A Bit about Smelly People

There seem to be a lot of smelly people around lately. I don’t know if it is the weather or anything, as that is what we all usually blame things on isn’t it, the weather? But there just is. When queuing up at some till, I end up stood next to a right smelly git. It is not just BO, it other dirty smells too, like clothing or bad breath. The kind of smell that makes you want to run off screaming, Danger! There is a smelly person at large! But you can’t do that, can you!

There seems to be an epidemic of smelly people, a bit like a zombie holocausts, but you can’t blow smelly people’s heads off with a 12 bore, can you! It’s against the law. I wonder, though, if the smell of the smelly people is spreading, like a zombie plague. Not by bite, of course, but maybe by touch. The touch of the smell. One touch by one of the Pongies and you become a pongie, too. Oh no, I might have been touched and smell and don’t know it.

I can see the film versions of this terrible chapter in our history now: Pongie, Dawn of the Stink, or Pongie Night of the Living Whiff, or 28 Stinks Later. Maybe I am just worrying, maybe there is no Pongie holocaust.  Perhaps these people just need to shower more often. Smelly gits.