We begin Friday night’s blog, the gateway to this bank holiday weekend, with a look at slugs. I have been having problems with them, you see, and they have been giving me a lot of trouble… I don’t mean that they have been rowdy, playing their music loud and having general anti-social behaviour… Mind you, they have been anti-social in a way. No, I mean they have been getting into my house. No, not breaking in a steeling the DVD player… but getting in and leaving their gross snail trails all around my dining room. There are no signs of the actual slugs, just the slime.
I have tried putting salt on the floor and have sealed my back door better… but they still get in! I have, today, put salt at the door outside, which I have tried before but to no avail. There are no holes or big gaps in the door in my kitchen/diner so how are they able to get in? It is so annoying waking in the morning and coming down to their silver snail mucus on the floor. I quickly rub it away with the soles of my slippers, but it can’t be good for the carpet can it!
They come sometime during the night, (not every night, they have time off) when we are all asleep, silent predators, creeping and sneaking. But how do they know it is night time… and how do they know there is no one around? I can go to bed at twelve and get up at seven and their trails will be there.
If you have any tips, then let me know.
If not, all I can think to do is one of the following.
1, Set my alarm clock for 3am, go downstairs with a large hammer and squash them all to death… or perhaps forget about the hammer and just pick them up and chuck them outside (however, they might be back).
2, Put salt all around my house. Problem is though that salt goes soggy and also people might think I am crazy.
3, Put slug pellets outside and kill all the slugs in the area? Tempting…
Perhaps I could…
4, Go back to choice one, but capture the slugs and send a message to their leader saying I will only set them free if they promise not to enter the house again. Could sign a kind of treaty, like the Treaty of Rome… call it the Treaty of Roam?? I did a similar thing with gnomes, called it the Treaty of Little People. They don’t like being called gnomes, it hurts their feelings.
But I digress. Which reminds me of another time I digressed, in the mid nineties, I was talking to a friend at work.
Anyway. Slug help needed. Slugs Out!
By the way, I have updated my settings on this blog so everyone should be able to leave a comment now without logging on…
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